Thursday, August 14, 2008

This Just In...

I am an overly-zealous NPR listener. I listen to my local NPR station from 6 A.M. to 4 P.M. every day. I won't link to Atlanta's NPR station WABE because they suck(a topic for another day perhaps). As much as I enjoy NPR, and all news in general, I sometimes get a little sick of the same old same old. Do we, as NPR listeners, really benefit from hearing a ten minute segment on the latest bombings/killings/fanaticism in Lebanon?
Instead of spending all that time and money to report on topics that have been revisited ad nauseam, why not just record a short message and change the names and places.
So here, dear reader, is the world news in a nutshell-for the last and the next 2000 or so years.

The Middle East-The Jews hate everyone. The other Middle-Easterners hate the Jews and each other (Sunni and Shia Muslims, etc.). They will kill each other on a daily basis just like they have been doing for the past 4000 years.

Africa-We are at exactly the same level of development that we were about 400,000 years ago. Except now we have guns.

Asia-We have a a shit-load of people and therefore have no regard for life-human or otherwise. However, we do make cheap VCRs which you will continue to buy no matter how inhumane we are to our citizens and workers.

Central/South America-Viva the three D's-Drug Lords, Despots, and Donations from the U.S.A. to keep the first 2 in power.

The United States-A bunch of nice folks screwed over for the past 200+ years by a slow, inefficient, and abusive government.

So there it is.
Am I oversimplifying? Being snide and flippant? Voicing a typical nihilistic Gen-X viewpoint?
Unfortunately, no.
Thankfully, rock and roll still rules.
And so do I.

3 comments:

angela said...

i love that you keep telling us that you rule.

i agree.

Robby Rattail said...

I would also add the most americans are criminally short sighted and care more about their taxes than whether the actions they take have a detrimental effect on other people,places, animals, things (you pick it)and will fight to the death to protect their right to act like an asshole. USA USA!

Tim G said...

Robby, well put and, unfortunately, all too true.